Back to square one.
It’s like taking two steps forward and then ten steps back each time.
You think you’re making headway.
You think you’re progressing.
You think “Ah! Yes! Finally, I have gotten through to these people.”
But then a problem or some situation arises and you look around for a shoulder to cry on.
Just you, your problem and no solution.
I often wonder if I am being punished for always having most things together and operating as they should in my life.
Am I? Why is it that in my time of need all I have is myself?
Is it that I portray the character of a solely independent woman who needs no assistance from anyone?
Is it because I always find a way to work things out on my own that my counterparts have put so much faith in my coping abilities that they disappear in thin air when I need them most?
Has anyone ever thought just for a second that maybe, just maybe I need people too?
I’ve spent my days on this Earth giving and giving. Non-stop. For nothing in return.
And now that I ask for the same treatment, am I demanding too much?
The sad part is, I won’t stop giving. I’ll still be too nice. I’ll still be there at their beck and call. I’ll sit with them in their darkness and help to piece them together. Each time, giving a piece of me to patch where their pieces can’t be found.
Because that’s me.
A carpenter and artist in my own right.
But let me pick your brain. What happens when the carpenter has no more tools? And the artist runs out of paint and her paintbrushes are all broken?
Who will fix her? Who will make her art?
People often forget that even doctors who help to restore health get ill at times. And teachers don’t know everything and so they too need to be taught.
I remember my mom, a guidance counsellor, would often say “yes the counsellor is here for everyone. But who is going to counsel the counsellor when the time comes?”
– Nashelle Hird